Sarah Burningham: Teen Author

My Book Tour Starts Today!

This morning I got up at the crack of dawn (literally the crack) to fly out to Cincinnati/Dayton for the first stop on my book tour. Check out the schedule below to see if I'm coming to your city. And if I am - you should stop by because I would LOVE to see you!

Oh, did I mention that my mom is going to come with me to a few cities? How fun is that?!

DAYTON, OH - Wednesday, April 30, 2008 @ 7:00pm
Books & Co.
For more information, call: 937-429-2169
or visit: Books & Co.

SALT LAKE CITY, UT - Thursday, May 1, 2008 @ 7:00pm
The King's English
1519 S. 1500 E.
Salt Lake City, UT 84105
For more information, call: 801-466-5151
or visit: The King's English

SALT LAKE CITY, UT - Saturday, May 3, 2008 @ 11:00am
East Millcreek Library
2266 Evergreen Ave.
Salt Lake City, UT 84109
For more information, call: 801-944-7622
or visit: Go City Kids

SEATTLE, WA - Sunday, May 4 @ 12:00pm
Ft. Lewis - Military Base
Building 5280 Pendelton Avenue
Ft. Lewis, WA 98433
(near Seattle)

REDMOND, WA - Sunday, May 4, 2008 @ 3:00pm
Borders
16549 NE 74th Street
Redmond, WA 98052
For more information, call: 425-869-1907
or visit: Borders in Redmond

SEATTLE, WA - Monday, May 5, 2008 @ 7:00pm
Third Place Books
17171 Bothell Way NE
Lake Forest Park, WA 98155
For more information, call: 206-366-3316
or visit: Third Place Books

SAN FRANCISCO / PLEASANTON, CA - Tuesday, May 6, 2008 @ 6:30pm
Towne Center Books (Mother/Daughter Pizza Party!)
555 Main Street
Pleasanton, CA 94566
For more information, call: 925-846-8826
or visit: Towne Center Books

PHOENIX, AZ - Wednesday, May 7, 2008 @ 7:00pm
Changing Hands
6428 S. McClintock Dr.
Tempe, AZ 85283
For more information, call: 480-730-1142
or visit: Changing Hands

LOS ANGELES, CA - Thursday, May 8, 2008 @ 7:00pm
Book Soup
8818 Sunset Blvd.
West Hollywood, CA 90069
For more information, call: 310-659-3684
or visit: BookSoup

GREENWICH, CT - Monday, May 12, 2008 - 2 Events
Parents Together Group Meeting @ 9:00am
For more information, visit: Greenwich Schools 

Just Books & Arcadia Coffee Company, Mother & Daughter Dinner/Book Talk @ TIME TK
28 Arcadia Road
Old Greenwich, CT 06870
For more information, call: 203-637-0707
or visit: Just Books

Ask Sarah B - You Ask, I Answer - Questions from Real Teenagers

Here's your weekly Ask Sarah B sesh. Remember if you want to ask a question and get some advice, you can email me at: AskSarahB@gmail.com

Question:
Prom is in 2 weeks and my parents are making me come home at midnight. That's my regular curfew! Everyone else is staying at this girl's cabin and they won't let me. How can I get them to let me go?

- Ellie

Sarah Says:
Dear Ellie,
Prom is definitely a special occasion so I can understand why you're upset that your parents won't at least extend your curfew. But you still have two weeks and that's plenty of time to try and work out a compromise with them.

Do they know the guy who asked you? If not, then the first thing you should do is introduce them. Have the guy meet you at your house before you go hang out or study so you can casually have him meet your parents (no pressure on them or him). For parents, knowing who their daughter is going to be hanging out with all night is a big deal. It's part of the trust issue.

Once they've met the guy and can see that he's decent (he is, right? If not, you can definitely get a better date!), you need to sit down for a heart-to-heart. Lay out exactly what your prom plans are - what time you'd get picked up, where you'd go to dinner, and who would be in your group. Ask them why they don't want to give you a later curfew? Is it because they don't want you going to the cabin? Or because they're worried about you driving so late? Figure it out so you can address their concerns directly.

Then, suggest some alternatives. Maybe you can go to the cabin for a few hours and they'd be willing to pick you up. I know that's not staying but at least you'd get some chill time. Or maybe they'd at least give you an extra hour if you offer to help them out with some extra chores. Offer to trade - after all, this is important to you!

I hope that gives you a few ideas. If you still don't get anywhere, this might be one of those situations when you resort to begging, but I think your parents will listen to you if you keep cool and are willing to compromise.

I hope you have a great time at prom! Let me know how it goes.
xoxo
Sarah B

**Note: the names of all teenagers in the "Ask Sarah B" section have been changed to protect individual's privacy

Cameras installed to watch teen drivers

If my dad could've, he would've installed a GPS chip in my arm when I was a teenager. He also liked teasing me that he kept track of the car mileage so he knew how far I was driving every time I borrowed his car. But I knew he was just razzing me. It was kind of the same thing with the GPS, but only kind of. There's part of him that really would've tried to do it if he could've. You know...parents get worried. They (and you) can't help it.

So I shouldn't be surprised that there's a new insurance program being tested that installs cameras in the cars of teenagers to watch them and make sure they're driving safely. It grades the videos for riskiness and then sends the video back to parents.

I'm a little wierded out by cameras in general. I just don't like the idea of people being able to see me re-tuck my shirt while I'm in the elevator (or pick my wedgie) but I've never been in a car with a camera. My brother-in-law has a back-up camera. Similar, only in these cases, the camera is turned to look inside the car, too.

So far, the study reports that "teen drivers participating in the program have had far fewer crashes and injury accidents than would have been expected based on national driving statistics. It also says driving risk scores measured in the recordings dropped an average 80 percent during the first 16 weeks."

Those are impressive results but I'm willing to bet that you could get the same ones just with the threat of a camera (my dad's GPS idea, while impossible, drove the message home for me). It was expected that if I got to drive, I would be a safe driver. And all those hours practicing with my dad in the passenger seat were helpful when it came to being safe. It will be interesting to see if parents really do put cameras in their cars. I don't think mine would've, but I'm not sure. And would I? I don't think so - not unless there had been accidents and tickets that warranted it. I think as long as you've earned, and keep, your parents trust, no cameras are necessary. I was a good driver. My sister Annie on the other hand? She might have gotten a camera installed. (Sorry, Annie!)

What do you think? How would you feel about a camera in your car? Do you think your parents would install one? Why or why not?

The Today Show!!

It was so amazing to be on the Today Show yesterday. The day started when the town car picked up me, my mom, and Grant and drove us down to Rockefeller Center. After getting settled in the greenroom (Grant was even more nervous than I was!) the producer took me down to get my makeup and hair done. (I wish I could do that every single morning. It's amazing what the hairdresser could do with my stick straight hair and it was heaven having someone do my makeup!) And then it was just a few minutes before I walked on to the set, got miked, and started talking with Ann Curry and Michele Borba.

What a whirlwind! It was really wonderful. Every minute of it. My mom took a bunch of pictures and when I figure out her camera (I swear, sometimes I think they make cameras hard to work on purpose) I'll post them. But for the time being, here's the segment...Enjoy!

Girl Worth Getting to Know - Kayte Gyles

I consider myself one of the luckiest people in the world because I get to meet some really, really cool teenagers - and 18-year-old Kayte Gyles is one of them.

I met Kayte and her parents when they were in New York last month visiting from British Columbia, Canada. If you met Kaye today, you would be impressed with her sense of humor and boundless energy, that fact that she's a competitive curler, and how much she loves her dog. But what you wouldn't know is that Kayte is also a cancer survivor and she's about to shave her head again, this time to help other people dealing with cancer.

We had so much fun hanging out and Kayte is such an incredible person, that I wanted you all to get to know her, too.

SB: Even though you look great with a shaved head, you didn't do it for a fashion statement (at least not at first!). Tell us why you did it.
KG: Well, I went bald for the first time last year when I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. I was diagnosed twenty days before my seventeenth birthday and my chemotherapy caused me to lose my hair. I actually ended up shaving my head the day after my birthday because I wanted some control over the cancer.

Now, I’m going bald for a second time. It’s been nine months since my last chemotherapy and I have some hair, not a lot. I’m going to be shaving it on April 26th (that's tomorrow!) for a fund raiser called Balding for Dollars. (Donate to support Kayte and her cancer awareness efforts!) It’s an amazing organization that does so many great things! Balding For Dollars helps families who financially struggle with all the extras. They hold teen adventure camps where we can just be ourselves and be comfortable with who we are. They have great camps for the younger children and for their families and they have started a teen support group that meets once a month. I can personally say that its one of the greatest things ever!

SB: It's pretty cool that you're out there raising money and awareness for other people. How else do you keep busy?
KG: Well, when I’m not bugging friends or family to donate, or help out with something cancer related, you can find me either on a curling rink or curled up on my couch with my laptop and my dog, Willow, writing. Sometimes I am out with my camera because I love photography!

SB: What was your first thought after your own cancer diagnosis?
KG: Well, my first thought when they told me that I had cancer was along the lines of, Oh S*#@!  But honestly, I wasn’t shocked. I’ve always been a kid who hasn’t been too healthy and there was always a part of me that thought one day I might have cancer, and it turned out, I was right!

SB: How do you think having cancer changed your relationship with your parents?
KG: My parents and I have always been really close, but cancer definitely made us closer. I became a child again and the things that were usually considered pretty easy definitely weren’t for me. My mom had to help me change, shower, and there was a time she even had to help me shave my armpits! Then when my mom wasn’t around my dad would have to help me walk back and forth from the bathroom and any sense of privacy was definitely lost.

SB: Tell us a little about competitive curling. (Kayte's quite an athlete.) How did you first get into it?
KG: I started curling five years ago when my parents told me that they wanted me to do something physical and they thought I would love curling. I personally wanted nothing to do with it! I thought curling was only for nerds and at the time I didn’t want to admit that I truly was a nerd. (SB: For the record, nerds are cool.)

Beginning curling was not a very fun experience for me! I was awful and there were some days that I wanted to quit and I even had a few coaches tell me that I should, but that’s what gave me the drive to do better. By Christmas, I was absolutely in love with the sport and all my presents had something to do with curling.

In these past five years, my team and I have gone to 3 provincial championships and curling is definitely a dream that will never die for me. Curling is my number one passion and I know that one day I will be representing Canada in the Olympics!

SB: Since this is an interview for RaiseYourParents.com do you have any great tips for dealing with parents in general?
KG: Honestly, I’ve never really had problems with my parents. I’m an only child and from the get go we’ve always treated each other with respect. The worst thing I have ever done as a child is get cancer and that wasn’t even my fault. I never gave my parents a reason not to like me and in return my parents have never given me a reason to rebel against them. I think it all comes down to trust and respect and understanding of each other.

SB: You're a senior this year, what are your plans for next year?
KG: I’m taking a semester off to curl competitively and then I’ll be starting school in the New Year and majoring in creative writing at a local college.

SB: If you had to choose what you wanted to do for the rest of your life right this minute, what would you choose and why?
KG: That’s a really great question and I think I’d choose to be a writer. I’ve been telling stories since I was a child and being an author has always been something that I’ve dreamed of. My dream and goal is to be an award-winning author!

SB: Ahhh, you're a writer. Without giving away any specifics, can you tell us if you're writing anything now?
KG: Right now I’m working on a novel about my journey through cancer. It’s to raise awareness about teens and cancer and to also show that cancer isn’t something everyone dies from. Its something that looked at, the right way can be a huge life lesson.

SB: Anything else we should all know about Kayte Gyles?
KG: I’m insanely sarcastic, a total dreamer and my imagination is my best friend.

Want to support Kayte and Balding for Dollars? Donate here!

Newsweek, BookPage, and SmartGirlsRock Love my book!

First things first...remember that tomorrow I'm going on the Today Show! I'll be on around 9:00am so don't forget to watch. I'll post the video tomorrow after it goes on the Today Show website. I'm so stoked.

(Don't you love the word "stoked"? I think I'm going to try and resurrect it in pop culture...)

In other news...I did this interview for Newsweek on the "Eight Top Teen Health Hazards." What do your parents think are the biggest health risks in your life? I have to admit, mine were pretty much worried about everything and even though I'm an adult now, I know my mom is really freaked out that I drive a Vespa.

Also, I just got the first official review of How to Raise Your Parents: A Teen Girl's Survival Guide, and...it's great! Sometimes, even though you really believe in what you've written and are putting out into the world, you hold your breath hoping that most other people feel the same way. (I say most because I don't think you can ever please everyone.) I was basically on the verge of passing out from lack of oxygen waiting for the blasted PDF with the BookPage review to open but once it finally did, I could breathe easy.

BookPage is a monthly magazine that goes out to more than 400,000 bookstores, libraries, and readers in general, so it definitely matters what they have to say. Actually, I think it matters what everyone has to say, in print or not, but there's something so permanent about an actual magazine, isn't there?

Check out a few lines from the review:
"Burningham reveals the most effective techniques for understanding adults, handling professional worriers (i.e. parents), maneuvering around them and coming out a winner in the independence game...She delivers straight-talk in a funny and fun-to read format...Armed with How to Raise Your Parents, teens will have the inside track on effective strategies for communicating, negotiating, and compromising their way to the freedoms and privileges they're after--skills that will come in handy whether they want their own cell phone, a new hair color or a set of car keys!"

And that's not all. I've been saving the best for last!

SmartGirlsRock.com is a website that has actual teens (smart girls, of course) review books. So, you get honest, true-to-life girls like you talking about books you want to read, and which ones you don't. Luckily, the teenagers who read mine raved about it. Check out what they said:

"This book is funny without being stupid, informative without being boring, and helpful while still being one of the best books I’ve ever read...This is something every teen needs on their bookshelf or, more likely, on the floor somewhere."

Ok, I'm done with all my crazy excitement (for today)!

Should School Start Later?...Teens Need Their Sleep

My high school started at 7:30am. Every morning. Every weekday. It was excruciating.

Looking back, I have no idea how I managed to ever show up to my homeroom class on time. Not to mention all the days I went to early assemblies and school council meetings and had to get their at the ungodly hour of 6:30am.

Nowadays, I wake up at 7:30am. That's what time my alarm goes off, not the time I am supposed to be at my first meeting. (No, I don't go to the gym in the mornings - I really, really value my sleep.)

So, you can imagine how happy I was to read that some schools are considering moving start times to a little later and more reasonable time of day (i.e. nearer to 9:00am instead of 7:00am). Of course, this means that students will be in school later in the afternoon and I used to treasure those free afternoons when the adults of the world were still at work...but you can't have everything.

Do you like the early rise-and-shine schedule of most schools or would you rather get an extra hour of shut-eye every night? You know what I would vote for...

Ask Sarah B - You Ask, I Answer - Questions from Real Teenagers

Here's your weekly Ask Sarah B sesh. Remember if you want to ask a question and get some advice, you can email me at: AskSarahB@gmail.com

Question:
There is this guy I really like that rides my bus. Today when my friend and I were sitting on the bus he came over and asked to sit by us. My friend knows I like him so of course she said yes and she made him sit in the middle of us. But, word also got around and I think he knows I like him.

Also, to add to this mess he has a girlfriend. Anyways, he usually sits by another girl on the bus and the other girl sits on his legs. This annoys me because, obviously, I like him, and because he is going out with someone else.

Also, my older brother rides the bus so in these situations it makes it a little awkward. I don't know what I should do. Should I let him sit with me? What should I do about the girl that sits on his legs? Should I talk to him? I am really confused. HELP!!

- Andrea

Sarah Says:
Dear Andrea,
It sounds like you're in kind of a sticky situation with this guy. I think he's sending signals that he's interested - especially when he won't let you off the bus and tries to sit next to you. But then again, he has a girlfriend. Even if he is flirting with you and you like him back, do you want to be with someone who's flirting with other people when he's with you? It's a respect issue. He's not respecting you or his girlfriend.

I think you should play it safe and get to know him a little better. These bus rides sound like a good opportunity to become better friends and to find out what he's really like. And then maybe if he does become available, you'll feel like the time is right to make your move. And as for your brother being on the bus? I think brothers will always be brothers - they like to tease - so definitely just ignore it!

Let me know what happens over the next few weeks - I'll be eager to hear about your bus adventures!

xoxo
Sarah B

**Note: the names of all teenagers in the "Ask Sarah B" section have been changed to protect individual's privacy

The AP thinks thrifty teens is a new phenomenon. Hmm....

I was reading this article about the economy and the impact it's having on teenagers. According to the Associated Press, there aren't as many summer jobs available and with costs going up for everything from movies to flip-flops, teens are getting thrifty.

News flash: Teens have always been thrifty.

I mean, seriously, do they really think that teens had unlimited budgets before the market started to change? Teens have been shopping vintage and making their own clothes for years. For generations. Probably since the dawn of time. I think it's funny that the AP thinks this is a new trend.

What about you? Are you feeling the pinch from the stock market and rising costs of gas? Probably. But is it inspiring to learn to sew? Probably not. You would learn anyway because you have some killer ideas for a new skirt.

PS. Interesting fact: I read somewhere that a slice of pizza always costs about the same as one subway ride. Right now, a subway ride is $2 but the other day I bought a slice of pizza and it was $3. I couldn't believe it. Now I'm panicked that my subway fare is going to go up. Then I really might be forced to be thrifty!

If you're just starting down the yellow brick road of thrifty-ness, here are a few tips:

1. Recycle your clothes and wear your old t-shirts and tank tops to the gym. I actually sleep in mine. My Old Navy tanks are my favorite for summer when it's really hot in the middle of the night.
2. Craving a Jamba Juice? Pull out the blender, some bananas from your kitchen and some frozen fruit from the freezer. Mix with ice and voila! A free Jamba (at least free in the sense that you didn't have to pay for the groceries...)
3. Most grocery stores offer discount tickets to movies. Check with your local gas station, too. I used to get $4 tickets at the grocery store and save a few bucks every movie I saw. More money for popcorn!

What's your best thrifty secret?

CBS News talks to me about my book

Last week I went on CBS News "Up to the Minute" to talk about teen/parent relationships. (What else?)
I was on with host Meg Oliver, who is really cool and about to have her first baby. But seriously, you can't even tell. She was about to pop and when you see the segment she looks totally normal!

Sarah on the Radio

Last week I was on the radio show Walking on Air with Betsy and Sal with these two super funny moms, Betsy and Sal. It was one of the most lively interviews I've had because they both have teenagers! And actually, I was thinking that if I were one of their teenagers I would probably die of embarrassment because they were getting discussed on air.

I think my favorite moment in the interview was when Sal said that she and her teenage daughter took a road trip and her daughter made a mix of music for the ride. According to Sal, her daughter's taste in music was the worst part of the trip! I had to laugh because I remember trying to get my mom to listen to Alanis Morissette (her first album Jagged Little Pill came out when I was a sophomore and I still love it). Anyway, you would've thought I tried to make my mom listen to a soundtrack of dogs barking. She hated it! We finally made peace with one of my other favorites Carole King--my mom actually introduced me to Carole and now we're good old friends.

Back to Betsy and Sal--I have to say they must be pretty cool moms. (Note: if one of their kids reads this, email me so I can hear your side of the story!). They cracked me up so hard that at one point I worried I was going to choke on the radio! You can download their podcasts for free and check out their website for more about them, past shows, and other cool stuff.

Parents Find Texting Can be Better than Talking

You know something is becoming a national trend when one of the big newspapers (the New York Times, USA Today, Washington Post, Wall Street Journal, or LA Times) has a big story on it. So, I was really excited to see this story in the Washington Post a few days ago.

Parents are texting more to keep in touch with their kids? Finally! I've been saying all along that parents need to learn about all the new technology if they want to keep up with their teenagers. After all, teens are super tech savvy and are up on everything from the latest websites to IM lingo. It only makes sense that they'd be able to relate to their teenagers better if they're communicating the same way. Not to mention, it's no secret that as a teenager it can be really embarrassing if your mom or dad are calling you 24/7. With a text they can still say "remember soccer after school" or "when are you coming home?" without dialing you up 5 million times a day. It's a total win-win.

Along these same lines, when I found out I was going to be on the Today Show last week, I called my mom. I was at work, so I couldn't talk long, but within 20 minutes she'd told my whole family and I got texts from my sister Jennie and brother Connor telling me congrats. It just made things even more exciting and it was the perfect way for them to say way to go without actually calling me at the office. As they say in those Orbitz commercials...Fabulous!

My Top 10 Favorite Books of All Time (for now)

Continuing on my top ten list craze (inspired by Dave Letterman, who else?)...

Being a writer and in publishing, a lot of people ask me what books I read. And the truth is, a lot. I read a ton for work and a ton for fun, so between the two I average a book a week, at least. But even though most of them are great, not all of them have changed my life.

If I had to pick my top ten books of all time (keeping in mind that this could change tomorrow if I start reading a really amazing book) I would say these:

1. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald - I read this for the first time when I was a junior in high school. I liked it well enough then (it was better than The Red Badge of Courage - sorry, but it's true) but every time I've read it since then, it's grown on me. Now, it's an essential part of my library. Funny story: at one point between Grant and I, we had 6 copies of the book in our apartment. We've managed to whittle it down to 2 after nearly 4 years of being married.
2. Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging, the first book of Georgia Nicolson "Confessions" by Louise Rennison - I started with the eighth book in the Georgia Nicolson series (a gift from a friend) and proceeded in the next month to read all 7 others. I am a Georgia Nicolson nut! She's funny and silly (isn't that a good word to describe her?). Seriously, the kind of girl who can keep you entertained for pages just talking about mascara. Love all of these!
3. The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger. The most believable unbelievable love story in the world and the writing will take your breath away. Enough said.
4. Liars and Saints (and A Family Daughter) both by Maile Meloy. First of all, isn't that a great author name? Maile Meloy. I have a friend with the last name Maloy and if she ever has a little girl I'm making her name her Maile. And not only is her name perfect, both of these books are stunning. I lost myself in them. They aren't sequels but both bring the same cast of characters into play. This California family will remind you so much of your own just because of the people they are.
5. A Postcard Memoir by Lawrence Sutin. This is a totally original memoir written in short bits and inspired by random postcards. Literally brilliant. And the postcards are included so you can create your own memoirical (did I just make up a word?) pieces while you read along.
6. Self Helpby Lorrie Moore (although my version has this cover on it and I like it better -- I feel connected to it, you know?). This is funny and disarming and really cuts to the core of what we are all trying to be. The essay called How to Become a Writer is one of the most clever pieces I've ever read and I go back to it at least once a year.
7. The Awakening by Kate Chopin - I read this my freshman year of college and it really, truly changed my life. All the guys in my class had read it in high school (my AP English class skipped it for some reason) and they thought it was all rah-rah feminism and boring. I was so moved by the power of the writing and the fact that the main character recognizes her strengths and weaknesses in a time when women weren't supposed to have either.
8. Speak, Memory by Vladimir Nabokov - this Russian writer was such a lingual genius that he wrote books in many languages - no outside translator necessary.This is his subtle, beautiful memoir. I got lost in the minute details of life - everything from butterflies to buildings in St. Petersburg. And when I went to St. Petersburg I got to see his pre-communist era childhood home in person -- amazing!
9. The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion. I've never been so moved by loss and the description of recovering from it. Joan Didion is one of my writing idols and this is, I think, her best work.
10. Ex Libris by Anne Fadiman - It's a book about books for book lovers!

Ask Sarah B - You Ask, I Answer - Questions from Real Teenagers

Here's your weekly Ask Sarah B sesh. Remember if you want to ask a question and get some advice, you can email me at: AskSarahB@gmail.com

Question:
My stepmom is always complaining about my music. She comes in my room and turns off my stereo and sometimes will pull my earphones out of my ears to check on what I'm listening to. She thinks all music that isn't like a choir or opera stuff is devil music. I listen to really good stuff but every time I tell her that she gets mad at me for talking back. What can I do?

- Melissa

Sarah Says:
Dear Melissa,
Music is one of those issues that some parents get really worked up about. I think the answer in your case, is to do some major music jam sessions with your stepmom. I don't mean actually going to a concert or anything (we're not there yet) but making her a mix of stuff that you think can ease her into your music.

The first step is figuring out exactly what she likes. Is it really opera? Then maybe she'd like Idina Menzel's new album (Idina made it big on Broadway with "Rent" and "Wicked" and has a truly amazing set of pipes.) Or what about some mellow country music? Carrie Underwood (the American Idol sweetheart) has a squeaky clean image and her new album is really good.

After you've figured out a few albums or songs that you think she'd like, make a mix and lend your stepmom your iPod for the day. Tell her you feel like you guys might not have such different tastes in music after all and that you made her a special mix. (Not many moms would turn that down.)

Then, when you get home from school, check in and see what she thought during the day. If she liked it then you're off to a killer start. If not, offer to listen to some of her stuff and try to get down to the bottom of why she likes it. Is it tune? Pace? The actual singers? Just taking the time to understand her will definitely earn you points when it comes to the next time she complains.

Good luck! And email me your playlist - I'm sure it will have some good stuff that I should check out too.

xoxo
Sarah B

**Note: the names of all teenagers in the "Ask Sarah B" section have been changed to protect individual's privacy

Why are fewer teenagers learning to drive?

I read this op-ed called "Driving Miss Chloe" in the New York Times a few weeks ago and was surprised when I read the statistic that fewer teenagers are learning to drive - not because they can't, but because they don't really need or want to. I figure most things printed in the New York Times are correct (it is the most important paper in the country, after all) but I had to double check this stat. Why wouldn't teenagers want to be able to drive off in to the sunset?

Sure enough, it's true. Fewer teenagers feel the need to get their driver's licenses today than teenagers 10 years ago. So, what gives? I was so ready to drive when I was 16 that I begged my mom to take me to the DMV the morning of my birthday. I didn't even want to wait for the school day to be over. (She didn't go for that and I had to wait those painful 7 hours through my classes before finally getting my ticket to freedom. At least that's how I saw it.)

Now, though, I live in New York and I don't have a car. (I don't think a Vespa counts, does it?) And I'm glad not to have a car, not just because parking is a pain and insurance would cost me almost my entire paycheck (at least it feels that way) but driving is just stressful. Not to mention that gas is over $3.00 a gallon. This is going to make me sound super old, but less than 10 years ago when I was in high school, gas was 99 cents a gallon. Seriously. And I could barely fill up my tank then! I would try to go as far as possible on $4.00 because then I could get a diet coke at the gas station, too.

Do teenagers feel the same way I do? Is driving just too much of a hassle? I know parents are worried about their teenagers driving because it can be dangerous but I think teens are motivated by something different. Why do you think not as many teenagers care about driving? Is it because their friends are driving? Or because they have to pay for their own gas and insurance? Or because they really are just happy to have their parents drive them around? What do you think?

Quote of the Day

"I have really great parents that were never weirdos."

- Ellen Page, Juno star, Hollywood starlet, and all-around cool girl on why she turned out so much better than a lot of other young actresses who keep getting arrested and showing up on the cover of US Weekly for bizarre scandals (I'm not naming names but you know who I'm talking about)

I'm going on the Today Show!

Yes, it's true. Yours truly is going to appear on the Today Show (yay!!) the morning of April 25th (Mark your calendars!) to talk about How to Raise Your Parents: A Teen Girl's Survival Guide. How cool is that?! I'll be on during the 9:00am hour and if I do say so myself, watching the segment is definitely a good reason to be a little late for school that morning. You have to watch so you can tell me what you think.

In other important news, now I have to figure out what to wear! A total dilemma. I was thinking about this dress but yellow isn't a great color for me and it's a freaking fortune. Any ideas? Help me, fashion gurus!

Top Ten Things I'm Excited About for Spring

My parents came to visit me and my husband in New York a few months ago (they hadn't come to see us in THREE YEARS and I told them if they didn't come by March 1, 2008, they were officially disowned. They booked plane tickets like the next day--they could tell I was serious). Anyway, in honor of their visit, I called a friend who works at The Late Show with David Letterman (good friend to have, right? That's not the only reason I like him, promise!) and we got tickets to the show! My dad totally loved it--definitely the highlight of the weekend. Diane Keaton was on that night. Oh, did I mention my parents brought my sister Jennie with them? We had so much fun!

Anyway, I was thinking about the show and one of the best parts was watching Dave give the Top Ten List. That night it was the "Top Ten Signs You're Watching a Bad Monster Movie" (Cloverfield has just come out and Dave didn't recommend it.) Since then, I've been making all sorts of random top tens lists in my life. (Random fact, the way I got on to the school paper in high school was writing a top ten list of why they needed me. The faculty advisor loved it and I was on.) Anyway, since I've become a sort of top ten addict, I decided to write the top ten things I'm excited for this spring. Here goes:

1. Wearing flip flops. I love how havaianas are plastic but don't cut into your skin.

2. Having the sun stay up later and later. Hello, 8:00pm walks home through the park!

3. Getting a little color on my cheeks. I'm super scared on skin cancer (this is the best fake tanner ever) but I love having just a touch of sun on my face. Right now I look like Casper's big sister.

4. Free summer concerts in Central Park!

5. Going on my book tour!!

6. The fact that the new Indiana Jones movie is coming out on May 23rd! I love the first three. How could you not?

7. Sitting outside at cafes (it's not Paris, but better than inside, don't you think?)

8. Getting to pet all the little dogs that are walking around with their owners. I wish I could have a cute, fuzzy, little puppy.

9. How the month of May is usually the perfect temperature in New York! (The rest of the summer is pretty much sweltering hot and you sweat just standing there, so May is heaven.)

10. Jamie Lidell has a new album coming out at the end of April. Remember that Target TV commercial "a little bit more, a little bit more?" Can't wait to see what Mr. Lidell has to offer this time around.

Sign up for my newsletter and GET FREE STUFF!

For all of you who haven't already, you should sign up for the Sarah Says Newsletter (just look over to the right hand side of this page and there's a spot for you to enter your name and email - easy as that!)

Not only do I want to share important news with you, but I have some really cool give-aways - and you have to be on the newsletter to get them!

Here's my latest newsletter (check out the MAC lipglass and J.Crew bracelet give-aways) and remember to sign up to be considered for the May free stuff. (It's going to be just as cool as this month's.)

As a side note, the winners for April will be announced next week.

APRIL 2008

Hi Ladies, Welcome to the very first issue of the SARAH SAYS newsletter, where each month you'll get advice on everything from dying your hair to how to talk to the guy you're crushing on. I'll include real reader questions, the latest and greatest news from the teen world, and some super cool give-aways (let's hear if for free stuff!). If you want advice or just want to share what you're going through, drop me an email at AskSarahB@gmail.com, or stop by my website www.RaiseYourParents.com. I can't wait to hear from you! xoxo Sarah ASK SARAH B You Ask, I Answer Question of the Month: Dear Sarah, My Bat Mitzvah is coming up and my mom promised me that I could get highlights a couple weeks before. Now, she won't let me because another hair stylist at the salon we go to told her that the color touches the scalp. After some online research, though, I found out that when they apply highlights, it never touches the scalp! She's a little overprotective now and then, but I just want highlights, it's not like I'm dying my hair pink or anything. Any advice? - Allison Sarah Says: Dear Allison, It's great to hear from you. How exciting that your Bat Mitzvah is coming up! Congratulations! It sounds like you're already on the right track for getting the highlights. You're smart to do some research on the actual highlighting process since it sounds like that's what your mom is worried about. I think she's more concerned about hurting your scalp, than anything. Am I right? Here's what I would do: Take your research to your mom and walk her through the actual highlighting process. Talk to her about why you want the highlights and if she's still worried, suggest you go to the salon together to talk to the stylist who will actually be doing the highlights. (Try to stay away from the other one!) I think the more you include your mom in the process, the less worried she'll be. Suggest that she go to the salon with you when you actually get the highlights (she'll feel more in control if she can be there) and make the appointment for a week or so before your Bat Mitzvah, so that if the color isn't what you had in mind, you still have some time to fix it. The key is to keep calm--I think your mom will respect that you've done your homework and that you've put yourself in her shoes. Good luck! I can't wait to hear how it turns out--I'm sure the highlights are going to look fabulous and your Bat Mitzvah is going to be one of those events you'll always remember. xoxo Sarah *Submit your questions to AskSarahB@gmail.com - all questions may be reprinted in the Sarah Says newsletter or on www.RaiseYourParents.com. Names will be changed to protect individual's privacy. GET IT, GOT IT, GOOD! Reader Give-Aways One lucky reader will get a gold and wooden bangle bracelet from J. CREW! A perfect touch for a t-shirt and jeans or sunny summer dress, this totally chic bracelet will make your outfit. Three lucky readers will get a brand new MAC Lipglass! This clear gloss is an essential for your book bag and handbag -  it looks great alone or over a colored lipstick. *If you get the Sarah Says newsletter, you are automatically entered to win one of the cool reader give-aways each month. Names are drawn at random and winners will be notified via email. Winners have 7 days to respond and the prizes will be sent out. Winners will also be announced in the following month's newsletter. THE BEST OF APRIL What's New, Noteworthy, and Totally Necessary this Month New: My book, How to Raise Your Parents, is finally available in bookstores everywhere! It's the essential guide to getting some privacy, understanding "ParentSpeak," and negotiating for a little independence. And, if you want, I'll send you a signed bookplate for your copy! Noteworthy: Carmindy, TLC's What Not to Wear fabulous makeup artist, is launching a new makeup line called "Natural Beauty inspired by Carmindy." It's available this month at CVS stores and if you're a lipgloss junkie like me, you'll love how amazing everything feels and that it won't cost you an entire night of babysitting to get a lipstick. It's totally glam makeup at drugstore prices! My favorite is the  moisture plump lip balm. Totally Necessary: An end-of-the-year sleepover! Before the last day of school, plan a Girls' Night Out with your fave gal pals. Watch movies, eat popcorn and just chill. I know summer is supposed to be relaxed, but between your summer job and working on your tan, it's going to be a busy one. Don't let it get started without some quality time with your friends. *If you have an idea for the "Best of" section, send it to AskSarahB@gmail.com

MTV takes on the high school newspaper

I found the funniest video online. It's a trailer for a new MTV reality show called The Paper, which is all about a high school newspaper.

I was a features writer on my high school newspaper - and I am embarrassed to say that I can't even remember the name of the paper. Our mascot was the eagle, so it was probably called "The Eagle" (duh) or something along those lines like "The Eagle Advocate" or "The Eagle Citizen." Regardless, it was nothing like this video--at least not for me. I joined my senior year (I didn't have time before then because I was busy taking all my college requirements) and wanted to write stuff about school scandals and breaking news on campus. I ended up writing about the socks the girls soccer team was wearing and why students weren't supposed to leave school for lunch. Not really that exciting but fun still the same.

My most memorable experience was actually a story I did on a wrestler who took 2nd place at State. I'll never forget calling the guy who took 2nd in wrestling to get a quote. His dad answered the phone and I said something to the effect of, "you must be really proud of Alex*." And he said, "what do you mean?" And I said, "The state championships--it's really exciting." And his dad said, "You weren't there? Alex didn't win." Poor Alex. There I was trying to do a profile on the fact that he was 2nd in the entire state and his dad was pointing out that he didn't win. But that's another story.

Back to "The Paper." The kids in this show are intense. My husband works at a newspaper and he says he can literally pick his coworkers out from watching this. It's them, just ten years older. He was editor-in-chief of the school newspaper and says his experience was a little different than mine.

So, I'm wondering, for those of you writing for school papers right now...is it really this competitive? Do you ever feel like you're in the "Vietnam of newspapers?" (Watch the trailer to get it!)

*I changed the name.

Ask Sarah B - You Ask, I Answer - Questions from Real Teenagers

This is the first of a recurring feature I'm going to do on my blog. I have tons of cool teenagers who email me with questions about their lives--everything from their parents getting divorced to dying their hair to telling they boy they like how they feel. And since I know a lot of you are wondering the same things, I'm going to share at least one question (and answer) a week. Here's the first of many...

Question:
So I like this boy and have for about 4 years! I know. I am in almost all his classes, I go to the same church...I see him everywhere. I am really afraid to tell him I like him myself. I don’t want to flat out ask him out, because then I will be heartbroken if he says no. I think he likes this other girl in my class but I am not sure. She like him, though, its so obvious. She is pretty and everything. I don’t know what to do.

Should I tell him I like him?
Should I try to forget him?
Get my friend to ask him?

 I am kinda shy so I don’t know if I would be able to tell him...
--Kelly

Sarah Says:
Kelly, It's great to hear from you! I'm so glad you wrote. I remember in High School and college, really crushing on boys and not knowing what the next step was. Sometimes I'd give out enough hints they'd end up asking me out, and sometimes nothing happened. I think in the end, the best way I handled it was when I was upfront with both myself and the guy and told him I was interested. I know there's no guarantee that it will work, in fact a lot of times it didn't work out at all for me. But there's something really liberating about knowing what you want, and asking for it. I can't promise he'll like you back, but I will say this, you won't regret a missed chance if you decide to take the risk and tell him how you feel. One thing to remember, if he can't recognize what a catch you are, you can do better anyway.

Good luck with however you play it. Let me know how it goes.
xoxo
Sarah B

**Note: the names of all teenagers in the "Ask Sarah B" section have been changed to protect individual's privacy

I'm on TV!!

I had my very first ever TV appearance on Wednesday and it's up online for the world to see. New York 1 News (a local New York City channel) had me on to talk about my book and how to bridge the gap between teens and parents. They let me pick the topics, so I chose music, driving, and expressing your personal style--all pretty big deals when it comes to parent/teen relationships. I have to say, it was really fun!

The host really wanted me to have props - "think of it like you're doing a show and tell for second graders," she said - so I brought a bunch of old records to show music from your parents' generation (Rolling Stones, the Beatles, Carol King, Bob Dylan) and CDs from the current top 40 (Carrie Underwood, Jack Johnson, Alicia Keyes, Chris Brown) to show that there's stuff from all generations. My point: your parents don't need to be freaked out about your music!

One funny thing, though. Since Grant has a big record collection, (all the records I showed on camera are his) he said I should definitely use "Sticky Fingers" one of the most iconic Rolling Stones covers ever to illustrate my point. The only problem? It a total crotch shot and the producers said that just wouldn't fly with parents. (It was named the number 1 album cover of all-time by VH1.)

I see where they're coming from (uhmm, who couldn't?!) because this album cover was totally scandalous when it came out. And let's be honest, it's still a little shocking but I think parents are less scandalized by record covers than the producers thought they would be. Would your mom or dad be shocked by this?

Not to mention, the coolest part of the album is that the original one has an actual zipper instead of just a picture. Grant (a total record geek!) keeps his wrapped in plastic. So it's actually a collector's item!

Are you a Rolling Stones Fan? Check this out!

I am a huge, huge Stones fan. I love Gimme Shelter - love it - and can listen to it multiple times a day. At the gym, on the subway, in the elevator at work, walking up the stairs to my apartment, writing this blog post. Love the Stones. So you'd better believe I'm going to see the new Scorsese movie Shine a Light that profiles one of their concerts. Check out this sneak peak at the movie:

My Uncle's take on my teen years...

Since my book is just out, I've been emailing everyone I know about it. (Umm, if I don't tell them about it, who will?) Anyway, my favorite uncle - Uncle Mike - sent me the funniest email after he bought it. Totally cracked me up!

Sarah,

After perusing your book have come to the conclusion that you we're a naughty girl. I'm sure you're writing from experience, just too many juicy tidbits come through. Now know why your Dad's hair turned prematurely gray.

Great book, we're very proud of you and your accomplishments, even after the tumultuous teen years.

Mike

I just had to laugh when I read it because my Dad's hair really did go gray early but I swear it's not because of me! (Although I'm not sure he thinks that...)

Did you send me flowers?

The most mysterious thing happened to me this morning. I'm sitting at my desk at work (listening to the new Jack Johnson and writing emails) and a delivery guy shows up with a big flower box. Inside are 2 dozen gorgeous roses, all spring colors, and a beautiful clear vase. But...the card was blank.

I figured it was a mistake and called the flower company. I mean, I couldn't possibly look at the pretty flowers and not write a thank you note for the sender, could I? And it's not like I get flowers everyday.

The flower company was really nice but said that the sender wished to remain anonymous and they couldn't give me any details. I'm completely mystified! They aren't from my husband (I called him first to check) and my fam would've sent a card. So I have no idea who they are from but they totally made my day and I'm dying to say thank you!

If you know the secret-flower-sender's identity, you have to let me know!

xoxoxo